My Stop-Doing List

Hey there,

I really wish I had 20/20 vision. Hindsight 20/20. Roarin' 20s Part 2. Haha jk, sorry I had to.

Of course, a typical end-of-the-year post to start off the new year "right." Could I be more predictable? It's cliche to create resolutions for the new year, and some may argue it's overrated. I agree to a certain extent, but I also can't help it but reflect on the year ending and take note of actionable items I want to hopefully accomplish in the new year. Especially for the start of a new decade.

I am a fan of documenting and connecting with others, and that is a big part of why I even periodically blog or stay active on my socials. I also use it to hold myself accountable, and for self-reflection and... of course, to entertain my nostalgic moments. I have big plans for the new year, and I figured I'd just mark 'em here so we can all see how close I reach my goals. Share yours with me if you're willing, I'd love some peer motivation. Seriously, I need all the help I can get.

I read somewhere that a "stop doing" list is arguably more effective than a to-do list in isolation, so here's my stop-doing list for the new year.

1. Stop consuming unnecessary sugars (pop, candy, etc.) // No more candy, and limit pop to once a week or only as chaser
2. Avoid impulse purchases // Let it sit for 24 hours before purchasing, and actually make returns for items you didn't want 

3. Stop dwelling or overthinking when you can't control results // Get over it!! When it's unproductive. Set a time limit of how long you're going to let it affect you

4. Stop under-utilizing your gym membership // Gym minimum 4 times a week, every week
5. Stop making excuses to not cook // Only eat out max 2 times a week (meal prep)

5. Stop staying up past 10:45 on weekdays // Just do it. 

6. Stop leaving my "Future Reads" list long and untouched // One book a month 
7. Stop being lax about monthly finance check-ins // Just do it. Find ways to continue reducing expenses, and find a way to make an allowance income 
8. Stop being afraid of your own dreams and "big" goals // bullet journal, consistent blogging/video documenting
9. Don't compromise your own happiness to appease others // Stand up for your own mental health, self-care basics
10. Stop misusing tension, inconsistencies, and stress to create obstacles for yourself to avoid more important issues // Be aware of old patterns/habits, & don't allow yourself to go back to toxic but comfortable cycles

I love planners, playing around with fonts/typography, journaling, and I am looking for a new hobby.. So I will be attempting to start a bullet journal this new year, with these 10 things as core principles to "live" by in 2020. I'll keep you updated on how things go! Hit me up with any tips at all, or inspiration.

Happy happy new year. Do some good this year. Stop fretting about the petty shit, be nice to others. Forgive when you can, and keep working on being the most authentic version you can be.

Love ya,
Shan

February Thoughts

Life is about experiencing new things, taking risks, being bold, and making connections with other people. College is a very good place for all of those things to happen, but I feel like a lot of people do those things without having much thought behind it besides "having fun." I'm not saying that everything needs to be taken seriously all the time, but I believe in the meaningful memories created even during those temporary, brief moments in a conversation held with a stranger or during the times we step out of our comfort zones.

I've got 3 years and part of a semester left of my time in my undergrad life, and I want to make the most out of it. Time is going to fly by, and life is only going to get busier. This means that I need to stop overanalyzing so many aspects of my life, and just live a little. One of my teammates told me something I really like. She said "regrets aren't made, they are lived." I don't think this means to just disregard everything and go do things that I know I won't be proud of, but I interpret it as a way to follow my gut sometimes and be open-minded to change of perspectives and thoughts. Knowing myself and how I reflect, self-evaluate, and analyze every situation a lot through detailed emotional dissection, that isn't always a good thing. If being scared of making a regret is the only thing holding me back, then it's not quite worth it. My morals and values are still with me and will be with me for the rest of my life, but some tweaks here and there will help me grow more as a person.

I shouldn't be so afraid to try new things. Whether that is trying out a new class, finding a part-time job, going on a date, or going out with my friends and teammates. There are so many things in life that have a gray-scale but are only perceived as black and white because of the broad generalizations and the negative stigma created by society. As long as I take responsibility for myself and own up to decisions I make, sometimes experiencing something firsthand is the best way to make a personal judgment on it.

I am not trying to tell people how to live their life because they can do whatever they want without caring about what others will think, but to put more value in a connection made with someone even during a brief interaction can make a difference in the lifestyle of college and create a more genuine and real bond between people. There are many definitions of  what a "value" is, and there are confounding factors involved with everything I've been saying, but these are just the main thoughts that have been clouding my mind lately. If it doesn't make much sense, I apologize. This is still a work in progress.

Talk soon,
Shan